Manifesto

October 1997

I sure do like them root beer popsicles. Two sticks, one stick, it doesn't matter. Popsicle Brand, Rocket Pops, whatever. The only thing better than root beer popsicles is spicy pork gyoza. Oh how I love that spicy pork. Dumplings, soft and tender, little brain-like packages filled with savory goodness. God bless the Japanese.

This is the MGB manifesto. This is where the band talks about interesting topics such as their love for root beer popsicles, spicy pork gyoza, orange pop, and toasted Lucky Strikes. Their most intimate thoughts burned into the computer screen for all to read. One must wonder if the world will ever be the same again.

I've got a hang up about writing things like this. I've got a lot of hang ups, and this is one of them. What does one say when one is talking about themselves. I'm yawning. I'm serious. I just did. Since I've already confessed my love for root beer popsicles and gyoza, what do I have left? The essentials? Okay, we'll start with the facts.

Name: Good, Matthew Frederick Robert
Born: June 29th, 1971, Burnaby General Hospital at approximately 3:30 am.
Hours of Labor: 19.
Were Drugs Used: Yes.
Hair Colour: Brown.
Eye Colour: Brown.
Current Height: 6 feet.
Current Weight: 147 lbs.
Graduation Year: Class of 1989.
Post Secondary: Two semesters of Art School.

Those would be the facts. I was unable to track down the other guys this morning, so they'll have to do their own thing in latter installments of the manifesto. I am now faced with the fact that, after the facts, I once again cannot find anything to write about. It's a hang up. Did I mention that I like root beer popsicles?

Maybe I should talk about our new record. Do you own a copy of it yet? If you don't, why don't you? I need money to buy spicy pork gyoza. What the hell else am I supposed to eat? There are thirteen new songs on the record. Some people say that's unlucky. If you own a copy I guess it's not. If you don't, well, I guess it is. You might find yourself eating some gyoza somewhere and wonder why you don't own our unlucky record. Is it because it's tainted with the number 13? Do you worry that your CD player will show this number and cause you bad luck at home? It's not like you'll come home and find out our record is actually animate. You won't find it breaking mirrors, strangling your cat, or trying to destroy the rest of your CD collection out of jealousy. If any of these possibilities even entered your head before I brought them up I don't want you to buy our record. You're fucking nuts.

Like I said, there are 13 songs on the record. Some of the songs are about things that I hate. Some of them are about things that I like. I have yet to write a song about spicy pork gyoza or root beer popsicles. I will probably do that on the next record. I'm not sure what I'd call it. I'm not very good at writing songs about things I like to eat. Maybe I shouldn't, I don't know. It's all so confusing.

Anyway, I'm hungry now. I'm going to go. I hope you enjoy our new Web Site. It cost enough, so you'd better. If you'd like any of your mail or e-mails to be responded to in the Manifesto please state that you do. I'm also thinking of starting a Web Site about people who really like root beer popsicles and spicy pork gyoza. Maybe I'll see you there. Maybe I won't. It's the future, who can tell.